I have known him since we went to the same school. At that time, everybody had a crush on him. Who doesn’t like Wonnu?
He’s tall, smart, and good-looking of course. He’s the ‘cool-nerd type of guy’ who uses glasses but has a charm that everyone would instantly fall for him.
Long story short, i get along with him. It was probably because both of us just broke up with our partner. No, we didn’t talk about our past relationship or something like that. We just talk about school-life, our music playlist, our hobbies, or random things.
One day, a silly-rumor spread.
‘Isa and Wonnu are together’
And i made one girl that really had the biggest crush on Wonnu cry. It was false rumor tho. We were never in a relationship. But deeply inside my heart, i’m… happy?
That was the time that i realized, oh i fell for him.
But a rumor was just a rumor. We were never in a relationship after that, but i still got those stupid butterflies when the idea of us being together came to my mind.
But once again, the idea was just the idea. The universe didn’t revolve around us. Funny thing, i had a new boyfriend. Wonnu had a new girlfriend also.
Nothing happened between me and him, until we graduated from high school.
My relationship didn’t work, and i guess Wonnu faced the same problem. The universe revolves around us, this time. We started to talk again like we used to. I took a year to realize that i still have a lil spot in my heart for him. The feelings never changed.
We are getting so much closer. The way he talks to me, the way he cares for me. Oh you don’t know how much i love being in love.
We started to act like we’re partners. We even have a routine too! I really love to talk about how my day is going to him every night before sleep. I love the way he replies to my story, and also i love listening to his raspy voice.
How naive i am.
But one day, i started to think about what is really happening to us? he never tells me to stay. He never tells me that he wanted me. What am i to him? What if i fall in love alone?
“What are we?” i broke the silence and tried to be brave. We are on a call like the other sweet-night-routine we had.
Shit, what did i say? i feel like i’m losing my mind and i feel something bad is going to happen.
And slowly, i can hear Wonnu is laughing with his raspy voice. I love his laugh, i really do. But not this time.
My heart skipped a beat. Oh this is it. I am in denial for a second. But the laugh just confirmed that the fact is true.
I fell in love alone.
It’s been only me in the first place. It’s never been us.
I ended the call.
And also i ended the idea of us being together.
